Mental exhaustion

I admit it…I’m in a foul mood but I’m doing a real good job at hiding it. But maybe it’s not a foul mood. I think it might be mental exhaustion from the 3 day working week that just finished, in which I feel like I did 2 weeks worth of work within those 3 days – and I still didn’t finish everything. I always finish everything. I am an ultra-organised perfectionist who works hard. I’ve never worked in a job whereby I haven’t finished everything I needed to. I know how to prioritise and delegate. It’s just, you need to have people to delegate too, and you need to have 5 minutes in order to reassess those priorities.

I remembered this morning that I forgot to have breakfast yesterday. I keep sachets of microwave porridge in my desk draw at work. I had intended to eat it whilst my PC was booting up at work. I didn’t do it. And I didn’t even realise I was hungry until someone told me how pale I was. It was about 2.00pm by the time I ate, and the shakes had set in. But I was still beavering away, trying to meet the end of month deadline – close of business Friday 29 April.

I walked out of work at 6.15pm last night just wanting to cry. I don’t like submitting sub-standard work, but until we get more staff, I need to come to terms with the fact that this needs to be done. At least I’m not alone as my team mate did the same. We ere the only ones left on our respective floors of the office – and we were pissed off.

Ah – writing this has made me feel slightly better. I needed a little rant.

Nighty night!


8 thoughts on “Mental exhaustion

  1. Don’t worry too much. Maybe you just need a vacation? I think that, when you are a perfectionist, people tend to rely on you rather than doing stuff themselves. Maybe it is time to let them make their own mistakes?

  2. Stop being harsh on yourself, we tend to wear out sometimes and it’s okay because we set our own bar and we are the ones who get disappointed when we don’t meet up to it. It’s all right, you are writing…doing what you like best, so rant as much as you want!

  3. Janine, I can relate to that frustration after working your butt off, and forgetting to eat, and having to finish a job knowing that you did the best you could under the most adverse circumstances, but still the results were not up to your usual standards. For some unknown reason, there are demanding jobs or clients that, however hard we work on/for them, the results are always unsatisfying. But as you say above, there’s only so much you do. Just console yourself with the thought that you did the best you could despite the obstacles in your way.

  4. If this persists another week (yes, I know it’s torture), request a meeting with your boss for the following Monday. You will be rested and less venomous, then. Have a discussion that relying on too few people to get work done may lead to an error that could have been prevented. The goal is to use the business purpose as the discussion, not you being tired or overworked.

    • Thanks Roy. I’d met with the boss a few weeks back : ) It’s all out in the open – we just 1) need to recruit new staff (which is underway) 2) streamline/document processes (which is underway) 3) all be on the same page (which we are having a team meeting on Thursday to workshop ideas). Fingers crossed it all works out. No wonder the team has a rep for no one surviving more than 6 months. I’m a sucker to try and make a difference so we will see what can be done.

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