I’m sitting here and I am stuck on what to write.
I’ve got seven working days left in my job, and I’m the busiest I’ve been in months. I guess that’s no surprise. For one, I can’t leave loose ends. I also don’t want to leave my team mates in too much of a lurch. I need to saturate them with all of the information in my brain, in the hope that they will be okay. OF COURSE they will be okay! What am I thinking. They are adults, and they should know these things by now. And then soon it won’t be my problem. Egotistically, I can entertain the thought that some of them may have realised my worth – too late.
So why care?
I just can’t help it. It’s in my nature. People call it naivety. People have said I’m way too nice. Others think I care too much.
I’ve watched my colleagues over the last few days, and I’m choosing to see the good in them. I know that the place we work isn’t pleasant – we work in a toxic building, it’s political, and there has been gossip and some pretty bad behaviour over the years. But, at this point in time I’m choosing to leave on a semi-good note – at least in regards to my attitude. I don’t want be angry, to hold a grudge, or become bitter, as it DID almost catch up with me there. Most importantly, I don’t want to move on to a new place carrying any psychological baggage.
Therefore, I may be stuck on what to write tonight, but I no longer feel stuck in my life.
- Stuck (redheadwriting.com)